The Questions, unanswered!

The Questions, unanswered!

“Mard ko dard nahi hota” (A man never feels pain!)

This resounding dialogue from the evergreen blockbuster “Mard”, starring over very own cinematic legend – Mr Amitabh Bacchan, never seems to lose its charm, even today, after a goddamn 31 years, since its inception. Well, where the people all over the country are getting crazy after such iconic catchphrases, all I’ve to say is thank you bollywood! Thanks for stereotyping the Indian men for the entire world and for the society.

For if, the society wasn’t enough, bollywood has played its part in branding a particular charming and a hypothetical image of the Indian men, effortlessly. Thanks to this combined conspiracy of bollywood and the society, the men are expected to be tough as steel, charming as a dream, rough as concrete and daring as a panther. But hallo! We men aren’t always what the society always expects us to be or what our movies present us to be. 

Just picture this: a woman crying in the public is offered a hundred shoulders to cry on and a rumbling sense of sympathy from every stranger present. But what if a men cries? Oops! Men don’t cry, do they? “Be a man damn it, don’t cry like a bitch!” Why? I mean, why is it a crime to feel hurt if you are a man? 

Like all human beings, men feel hurt too, they get emotional too and they feel pain too for god’s sake! Mard ko bhi dard hota hai!  

So, why can’t a man cry? Why does the society doubt the manliness of those men, who cry? Why on earth aren’t there any laws that protect the modesty of men, unlike a plethora of those for women? Why can’t a man enjoy a beauty treatment of manicures or pedicure, like a woman?

What would you do, if you see a man and say even 3 women indulged in a heated argument in public? Needless to say, majority of us will support the women, regardless of the knowledge of the actual reason of the feud, why? Is it a thumb rule, that only a man will be wrong, always? Can’t a woman have harassed a man?

 

A few months ago, there was a case in Rohtak (Haryana) where 2 girls beat up a man, and the crowd gathered to lend their support, blindly. The media coverage to the apparent barbarity of the man towards those 2 innocent girls, cost him his job, his reputation in the society and much more. And the girls – what happened to them? They became the TV and internet sensation within just days after this news surfaced. And then what? Well, it eventually turned out that the man was innocent and the girls were trying to push him of his reserved seat in a state transport bus and when he tried to protest, well the rest his history.

 So, why is it that a man is always seen as a barbaric creature and a woman as a damsel in distress? Agreed, there is a rapid increase of violence against women, and those who do that are really filthy scumbags. But then, why do we judge all the men, on the basis of a few?

 

The list doesn’t stop here. When men are the victims of these typical stereotypes, women aren’t safe, either. Ever seen a woman in a heated argument, using a really high pitched voice? Take for instance Dolly Bindra. So, what is our first reaction? A man abusing in public or indulging in a real fight with knocks and punches, would often go unnoticed. But if a woman does the same, then? Oops again! “Come on! Brace yourself; you are woman for god’s sake! Stop behaving like a rowdy.” Why? Not that I support a barbaric behavior but, why can’t a woman abuse, if a man can? Why does it raise frowns seeing two girls fight it out in public?

 Ever been to an industry, or say mechanical engineering department in any college? What is the first reaction, seeing girls/women filing a rough metal piece? Come on! That’s a men’s field buddy, women shouldn’t be there. Why? Why does it feel strange to see a woman riding a tractor? Why is it a big deal to see a woman doing an apparent men’s job, that she is capable of?

 

Moving ahead, to my list of unanswered questions, I’d like to mention a recent incident that moved me. I was out, ambling at the streets recently when a vendor appeared with his tattered clothes, bicycle and an infant son, selling inflatable items like balloons and toys. He asked me to buy something, citing his son was hungry. Call it my emotional stupidity (men can get emotional, right) or anything, but I handed him over a 10 rs note. And he asked me what I would purchase in return. As I was in no need of anything and I just wanted to help the old wretch, I refused to buy anything and asked him to keep the money still. And boy, he turned down my offer citing, that he wouldn’t accept the money until I’d bought something. So, even after a lot of convincing, he forced me to take something off his bicycle in return of that 10 rs note.

Now, let’s move a little forward and remember a news headline that became a trend on social media. “Vijay Malya flees India, duping the banks of 9000 crores!” So, a poor wretch is so modest that he wouldn’t accept a single penny without earning it and multi billionaire baron dupes the banks of billions, and flees the country. So, who is really poor here? Why is it that the opulent class is the one indulged in frauds and the poor die, working? What is actually the definition of poor then?

Moving ahead now – specifically to the country politics, I’ve a few questions here as well. A backward caste person in our country feels offended and insecure if addressed on the basis of his caste, but then bellows out loud that he belongs to the same cast, to devour reservation benefits, why? I in no way agree that it’s human to discriminate anyone on the basis of their caste or religion, but then the questions still remain. Why does a person feel offended at being addressed with his caste one time, and then brandishes it to avail various benefits on the same the other time?

 Why on earth, should there be benefits to anyone just because of their caste, in first place? A recent campaign in Gujarat saw a certain section of society asking for reservation, citing their financial and social backwardness. Well, the same campaign also saw the largest number of luxury cars ever gathered at one place – the campaign site. Why on bloody earth should I consider you socially or financially suppressed when you can afford the opulent luxuries of cars that a common man can’t?

This doesn’t stop here. Over two years so far, the country saw endless debates and quarrels on 2 unfortunate deaths/murder and 1 arrest. (Akhlaq lynching, Dadari; Rohit Vemula suicide; Kanhiya Kumar’s arrest on sedition charges). One thing, is too flamboyantly common in these 3 cases, to be a coincidence. All the 3 victims in these cases belonged to either a certain section of backward caste, or a particular religion. The unfortunate lynching of Akhlaq drew such uproar, that endless debates on growing apparent intolerance fumed the entire media and parliament sessions. What happened was unfortunate, agreed. The politicians and the media reacted to it, appreciable!! (Kudos for that!!) But then a similar incident happened a few days back, where Pankaj Narang, a dentist was mercilessly beaten to death by a mob of antisocial elements. Did I see any award vapisi, or public condolences by learned artists and politicians now, against the injustice that happened with that unfortunate dentist? Hell, nothing! Why – just because he didn’t represent a backward caste of the society?

Rohit Vemula’s suicide raised many debates again in the media and parliament, with many learned politicians expressing their condolences publically; appreciable indeed! But then thousands of students commit suicide due to many problems, some even due to this problem of reservation infested within the country, but no one beats an eyelid, why? Many soldiers passed away serving the nation in the recent Pathankot attacks and many pass everyday including those like Hanumanthappa, but why don’t they get any condolences? Why don’t they get any altruistic restitutions like Rohit Vemula or Akhlaq or the bloody and filthy menace Kanhiya Kumar – just because they don’t belong to particular caste?

  I don’t find it worthy of my time or my self-respect to comment on Kanhiya Kumar now. But, a few questions still linger in my mind:

 Why the only injustice that is fought upon is the one committed to people belonging to certain backward caste or a specific religion? Is it a crime to not belong to a certain section of society? Why don’t our learned politicians see this injustice? Who made this injustice prevail? And for how long will injustice keep prevailing?

As I conclude my chain of thoughts here, I’ll always be looking restlessly for all these and many other questions, unanswered.

»»»